JANUARY 2006

No Solutions on January 2, 2006

Creating Extraordinary Relationships (a four-part series)
Our significant relationships provide us with a lot of good things—love, security, protection, tenderness, intimacy, companionship, support, and more. If we are honest, however, we will admit that we want all this and more—we want an extraordinary relationship. With this in mind, we’re going to explore what it takes to elevate our relationships from ordinary to extraordinary—what it takes to truly love someone. Understanding these principles and putting them to use will help us get the love we desire, too. Whether you are married or single, in a good relationship, or in one that is struggling, this series is for you. What you learn could very well change the course of all your relationships.

Love's Essential Values
Live in Irvine, CA, January 9, 2006 - Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of January 23, 2006)
Maintaining a relationship that brings love, satisfaction, and joy is no easy achievement. But if you want to take such a relationship to new heights—make it extraordinary—there is something you cannot do without: a set of values you both hold in common. These are values so important that you protect them for dear life. Does it matter what these common values are, or does it matter only that you both agree on what’s important? We believe there is a certain set of key values that separates ordinary relationships from extraordinary ones. They are the true values that make love extraordinary—come and learn how they can transform your relationships! S-726

Unlocking Potential
Live in Irvine, CA, January 16, 2006 - Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of January 30, 2006)
At times, we see such great potential in someone, yet we notice over time that it never develops into tangible fruit. Is there something one can do to help? It’s all too obvious that nagging the person to change doesn’t help. Or perhaps you yourself are bursting with potential, but time passes, and your potential lies dormant, untapped. What can you do to somehow turn all that promise into a reality? Just trying harder doesn’t help. This evening at Solutions, we will give you an important key that you can use to unlock potential; with it, you can help yourself and others grow and improve. The benefits will spill over, turning your ordinary relationships into extraordinary ones! S-727

Give Up the Blame Game
Live in Irvine, CA, January 23, 2006 - Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of February 6, 2006)
When a problem arises in your relationship, are you quick to blame, or do you carefully consider how you may be contributing to the problem? If you’re able to stop yourself blaming, you’ll avoid getting caught up in the blame game. You may have to make a conscious effort to develop this mindset, since asking “What’s my part?” doesn’t come naturally, but it is vital to your relationship. The long-term benefits will far outweigh any temporary advantage you may gain by blaming others. Give up the blame game—it’s critical if you want to create the right environment for an extraordinary relationship to flourish. Come and learn how to own your own stuff—it will absolutely take a good relationship to the next level! S-728

Step into my World
Live in Irvine, CA, January 30, 2006 - Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of February 13, 2006)
Isn’t it a gift when someone makes a real effort to understand our experience, trying to see life through our eyes? It suddenly feels as if he or she has stepped right into our world! We feel understood. We feel connected to the person. It is a very positive experience. This gift is something we can give, as well as receive. How willing are you to try to see other people’s experiences through their eyes? Come and learn how to step into another person’s world without losing your sense of self. Doing this will work wonders in all your important relationships. S-729

FEBRUARY 2006

Learning the Language of Love (A four-week series)
In your efforts to communicate, do you sometimes feel like you have a bad connection? No matter what you say, you can’t seem to get your point across or your feelings out—you just end up frustrated, wondering how you wound up in yet another disagreement! Effective communication is a learned skill. It involves listening, being direct, showing concern for the other person’s feelings, and handling conflict in constructive ways. When you communicate properly, you will not only improve your relationships, you will transform them. At Solutions we’ll teach you a “love language” that will help you share your innermost thoughts and yet avoid the relational land mines we so often stumble into. By the end of this four-week series, you’ll feel like you can hold a satisfying, two-way conversation and really connect with the person you’re talking to.

Listening in Love
Live in Irvine, CA, February 6, 2006 - Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of February 20, 2006)
I’d venture to say that most of us think we are good listeners, and we may well be—some of the time! It may sound simple to just listen, but it isn’t. So many variables affect how a conversation goes. We find ourselves planning our response before someone has finished speaking, and then realize we haven’t heard a word the person said. Or we react to someone’s words in ways that surprise even us, and the person instantly shuts down as a result. Despite our best intentions, the other person may not feel heard. Let us help you improve your listening skills, a critical component of our “love language,” and the next time you’re listening to someone you care about, you’ll know how to listen in love. S-730

Let Love Do the Talking
Live in Irvine, CA, February 13, 2006 - Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of February 27, 200)
Our most fulfilling relational experiences can be linked to having a meaningful, open conversation with a loved one. These conversations provide us with a wonderful connection, and they can be fun and rewarding, but they can also be fraught with problems when the topic is touchy or when someone is having a bad day. It’s vital to know how to be clear and direct, saying what you really mean, and saying it in words that the person can relate to. A good communicator also considers the other person’s perspective, and knows how to tune in to subtle but telling signals. These are critical skills you’ll need if you want to master the language of love. You can learn how to “let love do the talking” for you! S-731

The Fine Art of Fighting
Live in Irvine, CA, February 20, 2006 - Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of March 6, 2006)
Disagreeing—and even fighting—is a normal part of all close relationships. Unloving or careless words can quickly turn a harmless conversation into a war zone. Since it’s unrealistic to think that all fights can be avoided, we need to learn how to fight well. In fact, fighting well can produce some surprising benefits: it can create true intimacy, taking the relationship to a deeper level. Knowing this, you may be less likely to run for cover when a conflict arises! At Solutions, we’ll let you in on the common reasons why fighting erupts, and we’ll teach you the fine art of fighting—an approach that will allow you to preserve love and get closer to the people you care about. S-732

Messages from the Past
Live in Irvine, CA, February 27, 2006 - Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of March 13, 2006)
Often, our biggest communication foul-ups are with the very people we care about the most! That’s because we all have old messages playing in our heads, and these affect how we interact with those closest to us. They interfere with our ability to share how we truly feel or ask for what we need. They cause us to react in ways that keep us from getting the love or understanding we want. Even though we may be using our best listening skills and choosing our words carefully, we find ourselves faced with the same frustrating outcome, a breakdown in communication. At Solutions, we’ll help you see how the past colors our communication with people in the present. You’ll also learn some ways to erase these messages so they no longer create interference. S-733

MARCH 2006

Maximum Success for Life (A three-part series)
Success in life is something we all desire. But what exactly is success? It can be defined as the accomplishment of a desire or a goal. The goal can be anything: developing a good relationship, building a career, losing weight, growing spiritually, or overcoming a personal problem—the list is endless. Yet even though success in life is something we all wish for, many of us have not realized our dreams, despite our hard work and determination. Effort and determination are important elements of success; however, they are not all you need. The missing elements may be the reason you haven’t been able to accomplish all you desire. In this series, we will give you the formula for maximum success so that you can find fulfillment in every area of your life!

Dare to Dream
Live in Irvine, CA, March 6, 2006 - Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of March 20, 2006)
We function best when our heart is freely invested in what we’re doing. When we’re passionate about our work, our relationships, or other areas of interest we are fulfilled, and when our passion, desire, dreams, and giftedness all work together, ahh!—we have found our sweet spot in life! To find it, however, there is something we have to do first: we must remove the chains that have kept us from getting in touch with what we truly dream about and were designed to do. Another important aspect of this discovery process is looking at life as it is today and then envisioning what life would be like if… Solutions will help you get a glimpse of your future. What you see may just motivate you to go all out and dare to dream! S-734

Failure, Obstacles, and Success!
Live in Irvine, CA, March 13, 2006 - Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of March 27, 2006)
Now that you’ve identified your heart’s desire, you’re well on your way to maximum success! But there’s something else critical to reaching your goals and realizing your dreams: learning to recognize both the internal and external obstacles that threaten to keep you from your goal. Obstacles shouldn’t stop you, but they often do, as do recurring patterns of failure. You must be able to diagnose what goes wrong, otherwise the same old patterns will continue to derail your dreams. Make no mistake, obstacles will arise but if you are prepared, they will have little effect on your getting to where you are headed. Solutions will help you eat obstacles for breakfast. Join the ranks of those who succeed in life! S-735

Reality, the Key to Success
Live in Irvine, CA, March 20, 2006 - Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of April 3, 2006)
It all began with a dream, but those who succeed in life do more than just dream. These are the people who not only dare to dream but who also have their feet planted firmly in reality. Knowing what is involved in reaching their goals and being ready to embrace those realities, whatever they are, is what separates the dreamers from the real achievers in life! Those who live in fantasy land don’t achieve their fantasies, but those who live in the real world do. Join us, and Solutions will provide you with the last step in your quest to experience maximum success in life. Make your life all that it can be! S-736

This Thing Called Love (a five-part series)
Love is one of the most powerful forces in our lives. It motivates and inspires us, and keeps us going when life gets difficult. It drives our desire to be in significant relationships, and in so doing, it becomes a source of great joy—and of great pain. Our understanding of the nature of love comes from our experience of various relationships. Unfortunately, because relationships can be so troublesome, we may end up with a false idea of love. In this series, we will explore God’s plan for our relational life and gain fresh insight into love as God intended it to be. Relationships, though they can bring many wonderful benefits, are not only about getting what we desire—that is only part of a much bigger picture. Relationships are about becoming who God intended us to be. God loved us first—He is the relationship expert. The different types of relationship He designed require different kinds of love, and the more we understand this, the closer we will come to experiencing the full spiritual life God intended for us. This series will help us get a handle on this thing called love—the real thing, love from the Source of all life.

In the Beginning, Love...
Live in Irvine, CA, March 27, 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of April 10, 2006)
It all began with God, so what better place to start our series on love than with Him? God created us, and He knows us intimately, our strengths and weaknesses, our hopes and dreams. Yet so often we go off in a direction contrary to His plan for our lives because we think we can do life without His help. We may not think such thoughts consciously, but our repeated attempts at taking control and being self-sufficient reveal this underlying belief. Sadly, when we look at the fruit of our lives, we often find that love has gone sideways, leaving behind it a trail of broken hearts, messy situations, and unrealized hopes and dreams. We need to get back to the way life was meant to be, and the way love was meant to be. We need to start at the beginning, with God! After all, He is the author of all that’s good in life, especially love. S-737

APRIL 2006

Family Matters
Live in Irvine, CA, April 3, 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of April 17, 2006)
We all began life planted in some type of family setting. Some of us had the benefit of a solid, cohesive family unit; others had a family that was loving, but too strict. Still others may have bounced from one parent to another or learned early on to fend for themselves. Some people make loving and dependable caregivers, while others are irresponsible—or worse. There is no perfect family situation; nevertheless, the family circle is where everyone first learns about this thing called love. So how has your early experience of love affected your relationships today? Now that you are an adult (or at least wearing the adult costume), where does your family of origin fit in your life today? Should these family members still be playing a significant role in your life? Should they be playing any role at all? These are important questions, and the answers are far-reaching. What you learn is likely to touch on every relationship you have, not just those with family past and present! S-738

Best of Friends
Live in Irvine, CA, April 10 , 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of April 24, 2006)
Very early in life, friends become important to us. As we grow, we lean less on Mom and Dad and more on our friends. Throughout our lives, whether we are young or old, single or married, friends enrich us and give life balance and meaning. They add spice, color, fun, comfort, encouragement, and love. Be it a few trusted companions or a wider circle of buddies, friends provide a safe harbor during the storms of life. They can be like a second family or the family you never had. These special people, if they know what’s good for us, will push us out of our comfort zone, stretch us, and spur us on toward our goals. Let’s explore, then, the role friendships play in our spiritual growth. How do they shape our understanding of love? Can friendships increase our ability to love? You may be surprised to learn how very important the right group of friends is in helping you understand love. Bring a friend or two and join us at Solutions! S-739

Falling in Love
Live in Irvine, CA, April 17, 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of May 1, 2006)
Falling in love... The very words tend to conjure up wonderful fantasies of happiness and joy! We long for that one special significant relationship. We’re wired to experience physical attraction and passion—powerful forces! In the absence of these twin forces, platonic friendships would be enough—and for some they are—but many of us want more. We want to “fall in love” and live life with another person at our side, anticipating that the experience will take our lives to new depths of meaning. This “falling in love” is the stepping stone into the next phase: committed love. God’s intention, from the beginning, was that our desire for intimacy, romance, and eventually erotic love would take us to that next level of relationship. Sometimes, though, we have unrealistic expectations for these love relationships. How do we avoid the pitfalls without destroying the fantasy? Join us and learn how to balance fantasy with reality while falling in love! S-740

Two Become One
Live in Irvine, CA, April 24, 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of May 8, 2006)
Two people who are in love, once they know that they want to be married, will often begin to yearn for the next stage in the process: becoming one. This oneness is what the Creator planned for in his design for marriage. God knew that through such oneness, we would experience a taste of heaven here on earth. We would know the comfort of having someone committed to us, someone who shares our hopes and dreams. When marriage works the way it was intended, it can be the most rewarding and fulfilling relationship designed by God. Nevertheless, when couples enter into marriage, a typical response is “This is much harder than I expected!” Becoming one with another person is not just about companionship, intimacy, and sex (though these are certainly benefits of being married)—it’s about living life as two complete people with love as the highest goal. Sound simple? It’s not! Join us for the final week of “This Thing Called Love,” and learn the secret to becoming one with your special someone. S-741

MAY 2006

The Emotional and Spiritual Connection (A six-part series)
Emotions are a huge part of our lives. Positive emotions like love, joy, and happiness warm and enrich our relationships and activities. At the same time, negative emotions like sadness, anger, and fear can cause distress and problems for us. What is the place of emotions in our lives? How do we best experience them, understand them, and use them? How can we change the ones that trouble us? That is the focus of this exciting new series. Over the next six weeks, Drs. Cloud and Townsend will help you see how best to deal with emotions, all the way from understanding the basic spiritual nature of feelings to applying specific, practical guidelines on handling depression, anger, fear, guilt and shame, and grief. Understanding the connection between your emotional and your spiritual life will help you immeasurably. You will learn how to keep going through the difficult seasons in life, and this knowledge will help you continue to thrive and grow in every aspect of your life!

Seeing the Big Picture
Live in Irvine, CA, May 1, 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of May 15, 2006)
Did you know that your emotions, as designed by God, are basically spiritual in nature? They have spiritual origins and even a spiritual purpose—to help us become aware of ourselves, our environment, and our relationships, and to help us draw closer to each other and God. But there is a darker side to the story: we also experience problematic emotions that make life difficult and at times even miserable. How do we make sense of these emotions, and how do we find God in the middle of it all? Solutions will help you see life’s array of emotions through a spiritual lens. This critical introduction to our series will give you the foundation for understanding how your feelings fit into the big picture. S-742

Dark Night of the Soul
Live in Irvine, CA, May 8, 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of May 22, 2006)
We’d all love to feel on top of the world all the time, but that just isn’t reality. No doubt everyone has experienced feelings of melancholy or sadness; these are a normal part of life. Something as simple as a movie can tug on our heartstrings and make us feel sad. It is only when negative feelings persist that they become a problem. When emotional lows develop into depression or hopelessness, life can feel dark. At such times, advice abounds. “Don’t think about it.” “Think positive thoughts.” “Get over it!” “Don’t worry, be happy!” “If you just had more faith...” None of this helps, of course, and it can sometimes make us feel worse. Surprisingly, though, there are more colors than black surrounding life’s most difficult times. Join us to learn about the causes and cures for depression. Solutions will help you see how to use depression as a positive force in your personal growth. S-743

Putting Anger in Its Place
Live in Irvine, CA, May 15, 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of May 29, 2006)
When someone frustrates or unjustly attacks us, we feel angry. Anger is a normal, even healthy emotion, given the right set of circumstances. However, when angry feelings persist, and we lash out at others, it’s a signal that all is not well. Emotional outbursts can be a serious obstacle to intimacy, and ultimately to our spiritual growth. So “Don’t let the sun go down on your anger” is sound advice; however, it is easier said than done. Promising not to lose one’s temper doesn’t work—anger is not a switch that can be turned on and off. If we are to find healthy ways of dealing with anger, we must first understand what drives our angry feelings. Putting anger in its proper place will go a long way toward improving all our important relationships. S-744

The Sum of All Fears
Live in Irvine, CA, May 22, 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of June 5, 2006)
Anxiety and fear about our future, our relationships, our jobs, and our health are common to all of us. Most of us have a few things we are frightened of, and that is simply part of being human. Sometimes our concerns are real; sometimes they are irrational. At times, we can let our fears become so severe that they get in the way of our lives and relationships, robbing us of the good things life has to offer. If you or someone you know is struggling with anxiety or fear of any sort, Solutions can help you get to the root of the problem. You can take charge of your life and conquer those fears once and for all! S-745

No Solutions on May 29, 2006 (Memorial Day)

 

JUNE 2006

Erasing Guilt Messages
Live in Irvine, CA, June 5, 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of June 19, 2006)
It’s bad enough, when you’ve hurt a loved one’s feelings or let a friend down, to be aware of it. But then to feel guilt and shame on top of that only adds insult to injury! We may think that guilt and shame are God’s way of keeping us in line so that we don’t screw up again. But these emotions in fact do nothing more than torment us, even paralyze us, and keep us from the relationships and happiness we would like! A life without guilt and shame would be a gift. But is that possible? Join us to clear up all the confusion about guilt and shame and find out how to erase those guilt messages that keep playing over and over. Getting rid of the guilt will allow you more freedom in your relationships. Join us at Solutions and get the tools you need to live that guilt-free life you long for! S-746

June 12 is a BBQ night! Come early for the food, fun, and fellowship (6 p.m., $5).

Grief: The Good and Bad News
Live in Irvine, CA, June 12, 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of June 26, 2006)
First the bad news: Pain and suffering is part and parcel of our spiritual and personal growth. Now for the good news: pain and suffering is part and parcel of our spiritual growth. Wait, now! How can the same news be both good and bad news? How can anything good come from grief? We all know how devastating grief and loss can be. Losing a loved one to death or divorce is a deeply painful experience. Losing home, job, or physical health is also an emotional blow. But here’s what you need to know: Grief is the pain that can cure all other emotional pain. Since we can’t avoid all pain and loss, looking at painful experiences through a wider lens can really help. Come and learn skills that will help you get past pain to better relationships and a richer life. S-747

Protect Your Love Life (a two-part series)
Your love life is one of your most prized possessions, and when we value something, we generally provide a safe place for it. How about your love life—are you protecting it, or have you let down your guard? Have you allowed personal issues to damage the love life you once cherished? In the next two weeks we will look at two of these in particular, control issues and bad habits. Left unattended, either one will rob us of the thing we care most about—love. If you or someone you care about is affected by these issues, don’t miss the next two weeks. Solutions will help you recognize and address these two problem areas and acquire some new skills to help you protect your love life.

Love’s Executioner 
Live in Irvine, CA, June 19, 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of July 10, 2006)
In the best love connections, both people experience lots of choices and lots of freedom. In such an atmosphere, love thrives. But when one person is running the show, making most of the decisions and insisting on doing things a certain way, the other may feel that he or she doesn’t have enough control, or worse, is being controlled. The person feels helpless, trapped, and inevitably, hurt and emotionally distant. Control is a love-killer. If control is casting a shadow over your love life, this Solutions presentation is for you. You’ll be given the keys to making your relationship less controlling and more supportive. It’s easier than you think. Don’t let love’s executioner take the joy out of your relationship! S-748

June 26 is a BBQ night! Come early for the food, fun, and fellowship (6 p.m., $5).

Hard Habits to Break!
Live in Irvine, CA, June 26 , 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of July 17, 2006)
Can you think of even one person who has no bad habits? Bad habits are just part of being human. Some habits are minor, but others are significant. They sap us of all the emotional energy we would otherwise put into having a close relationship. Unfortunately, bad habits can be deeply ingrained and hard to break, and they cause pain both to ourselves and those we care about. Smoking, drinking, overeating, being in toxic relationships, indulging in Internet pornography—whatever the habit, it gets a foothold in your life, and before you know it, this “thing” has taken hold of you. When a bad habit starts affecting those you love, it’s time to take action. Don’t let a habit ruin good relationships. Join us and learn how to finally kick that bad habit for good! S-749

JULY 2006

No Solutions on July 3, 2006 (Independence Day)

July 10 is a BBQ night! Come early for the food, fun, and fellowship (6 p.m., $5).

Instant Replay
Live in Irvine, CA, July 10, 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of July 24, 2006)
Have you ever walked away from a conversation thinking ”Why did I say that?” or “Why didn’t I say this?” Believe it or not, this can actually be a very helpful trait if we take it one step further and learn to see ourselves in action. There are benefits to being able to clearly observe how we act and how we affect others—practical benefits that play out in our relationships. There’s only one problem: it’s not something we do naturally. If we are to get the best from ourselves for the sake of our relationships, we need to know how to hit the “Instant replay” button. Come and pick up a new relational skill—with this skill, you will definitely improve all your relationships! S-750

A Word to the Wise
Live in Irvine, CA, July 17, 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of July 31, 2006)
There’s no perfect relationship. Nevertheless, people who have successful relationships have some things in common: one is that they have the knack of seeing little problems and heading them off before they become big problems. Ignoring problems or pretending they don’t exist is not a wise approach. If you see signs of pending trouble and are concerned, it is better to face the problem head on. Evaluating a situation is not always a simple matter, though. Besides offering a “word to the wise” about not ignoring those little warning signs, Solutions will give you an objective way of evaluating those signs. Who knows if what you hear may save your relationship from some big problems later on? S-751

July 24 is a BBQ night! Come early for the food, fun, and fellowship (6 p.m., $5).

Balancing Work and Life
Live in Irvine, CA, July 24, 2006 – Guest Speaker Bill Butterworth
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of August 7, 2006)
Life has often been compared to a race. Yet many folks never go the distance. Trying to balance professional commitments, personal life, family issues, and community activities can throw us off in our run. In this presentation, we identify possible reasons why we tend towards imbalance and how we can begin work on eliminating them. We include how to set meaningful priorities and practice the art of pacing in order to successfully balance the challenges of work and life. S-752

Key to Intimacy: Trust (a two-part series)
Trust is an essential element in all healthy relationships. To trust someone, you must make a connection from your heart to theirs. Without trust, a relationship will not thrive and certainly will not develop into the kind of deep connection we desire. The lack of trust can cause our relationships to wither and eventually die, leaving us with pain and heartache. Two significant areas of struggle are broken trust and misplaced trust. Most of us have experienced one or the other, if not both. The breakdown may have happened in an intimate relationship, or in the workplace, at church, or in some other setting. In the next two weeks, we will take a close look at these two common trust problems.

Once Burned, Twice Shy
Live in Irvine, CA, July 31, 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of August 14, 2006)
“Once burned, twice shy” certainly applies to broken trust. Knowing we can trust someone is a big deal in any close relationship. When we’ve experienced broken trust, it can keep us from opening up and trusting again. We may even find that those past experiences interfere with our current ability to trust even people who are trustworthy. We may really want to trust again, but we can’t quite overcome our fears of getting hurt. At Solutions you’ll discover how to trust again without getting burned in the process. S-753

AUGUST 2006

Love and Trust—Inseparable Companions?
Live in Irvine, CA, August 7, 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of August 21, 2006)
It would seem that love and trust always co-exist, but is it possible to love some people without trusting them? Many of us have been hurt or had a relationship injured because we assumed that loving others meant trusting them as well. The truth is, as much as we may want to trust those close to us, it is not always wise to do so. It depends on each person’s track record of trustworthiness. While love without trust isn’t ideal, in some cases it is the best approach, at least until the person’s trustworthiness improves. In fact, loving the person within appropriate limits may even help produce the desired trustworthiness. Solutions will show you that you can maintain a loving relationship and at the same time keep yourself out of harm’s way. S-754

Relationship Myths (a four-part series)
We may have grown up hearing people around us express firmly held beliefs that sounded perfectly credible to us at the time. As a result, we never questioned them, and may still repeat the same things, assuming they are the truth. Yet these beliefs, while they contain a grain of truth and sound convincing, don’t hold up under close scrutiny, and in fact can be quite detrimental to us and our relationships. It is time to explode these myths! Let’s take a close look at a few that powerfully affect our relationships: “It’s selfish to have my needs met,” “Just leave the past behind,” “I just need to give it to God,” and “If I change my behavior, everything will improve and I will grow.” This four-part series will set you free from some crazy-making ideas and give you a clearer understanding of what’s true and what’s not.

August 14 is a BBQ night! Come early for the food, fun, and fellowship (6 p.m., $5).

What About Me?
Live in Irvine, CA, August 14, 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of August 28, 2006)
The belief that it is selfish to have one’s own needs met is a seductive one. Certainly God’s example of selflessness shows us that being “all about me” isn’t a good thing. Yet we are each made with our own unique set of needs and desires, and when these aren’t met, it’s natural to think, “What about me?” Putting our needs on the back burner is ultimately not good for anyone, least of all ourselves—and for reasons that may surprise you! Moreover, ignoring our needs can lead to emotional and spiritual problems for everyone involved. Join us as we explode this common myth and offer a fresh perspective on “What about me?" S-755

The Behavior Trap
Live in Irvine, CA, August 21, 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of September 11, 2006)
Have you ever reached the point in a relationship where you decided, “I’m just going to go through the motions, even though my heart isn’t in it”? You were acting on the belief that having positive behaviors on the outside will change us on the inside. Too often, however, this approach doesn’t work. As a general rule, our actions do not give rise to our inner feelings—it’s the other way around! The problem with this myth is that those unloving feelings are a signal that something’s not right, and acting as if you feel something other than your real feelings may keep you from addressing the real problem. We can help you escape this trap and find a better solution. S-756

August 28 is a BBQ night! Come early for the food, fun, and fellowship (6 p.m., $5).

The Waiting Game
Live in Irvine, CA, August 28, 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of September 18, 2006)
Okay, so someone you love is driving you a little crazy. We’ve all been there! In situations like this, we may decide, “I’ll just give this relationship to God and He’ll repair it.” Time goes on, however, and often nothing changes. While there is certainly some truth to the recommendation “Give it to God and wait for his direction,” it doesn’t give the whole picture. Sitting around praying is not all there is to it; we also have to take some action and assume new roles in order to help change things! Join us at Solutions for a fresh take on “the waiting game” and “just giving it to God.” Taking a different approach could do wonders for more than one area of your life! S-757

SEPTEMBER 2006

No Solutions on September 4, 2006 (Labor Day)

September 11 is a BBQ night! Come early for the food, fun, and fellowship (6 p.m., $5).

Forget About It!
Live in Irvine, CA, September 11, 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of September 25, 2006)
Our relationships get stuck when we insist that we should forget about past problems and just press ahead—“Don’t dwell on what’s done!” Certainly it doesn’t help to dwell on the past or obsess about it, but at the same time, it doesn’t help to try to erase it either (besides, erasing it is impossible!). There are great benefits to reviewing and learning from the history of our relationships. Looking back can help us evaluate our present relationships and avoid some of the mistakes and poor choices we made in the past. Don’t miss this presentation! S-758

Unlocking Love's Door (a 6-part series)
Relationships are meant to open the door of our hearts so that intimacy and closeness get better and richer over time. Often, however, that door closes and gets locked, away from the safety and connection we need from each other. One of the best things you can do is to learn how to unlock the door and open it! In this series, you’ll be able to identify the particular locks that keep your hearts away from each other, and find the secret of opening them.

Where Are You?
Live in Irvine, CA, September 18 , 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of October 2, 2006)
Isn’t it strange how two people who initially wanted to connect with each other, often find themselves estranged and disconnected from each others’ hearts? No one ever planned for that to happen, but happen it does, and it places a real lock on the door of love. You feel unloved and misunderstood. This can change, however, with a little information and some practice. Learn how to get through disconnection, and into the closeness you both want. S-759

Ouch, That Hurts!
Live in Irvine, CA, September 25 , 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of October 9, 2006)
It’s hard for our hearts to be unlocked when a spirit of criticism exists. You feel put down, condemned, judged and not good enough. That’s not a healthy soil for love to flourish in. Yet we do need to be able to tell each other the truth, so that reality and honesty can win out. Find out how to get rid of judgmental criticism, and learn the skills of receiving and giving truth that heals, not damages, your relationship. . S-760

OCTOBER 2006

Being In Jail
Live in Irvine, CA, October 2 , 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of October 16 , 2006)
Two people who care about each other also respect the freedom, feelings and opinions about one another. That is how connection increases and thrives. But when a pattern of control and manipulation emerge, it’s a red flag. It can emerge as a guilt message, or an indirect statement, and can even escalate to outright domination. It can actually feel as though you are in jail. No love can last long that way. The good news is that you can get out of the control game, no matter what end you’re on. Learn the keys to saying “no” to a controlling relationship, and re-energizing the love you both want. S-761

Who's The Boss?
Live in Irvine, CA, October 9 , 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of October 23 , 2006)
Too many relationships have a parent-child feel to them. That is, one person tends toward being irresponsible and somewhat out-of-control (child); the other is the over responsible, enabling person (parent). The child resents the parent¹s nagging, and the parent gets tired of doing all the work! This is a major lock on love¹s door. Fortunately, there is a lot you can do here to fix that, and it¹s all about moving from parent-child to adult-adult connections! Tonight, you¹ll discover the keys to this important issue. S-762

I Deserve Better Than That!
Live in Irvine, CA, October 16 , 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of October 30 , 2006)
OK, we’re all special. You chose someone because they were special to you, and vice versa. However, special is unhealthy when it borders on “entitlement”, and it can lock love’s door for a long time. When a person has entitlement issues, they believe they should be treated better than others; they may resist being confronted, or not admit fault for things they do. This can be a sticky problem when you want a free and honest relationship! But entitlement issues can be given up and resolved in relationships. Join us and discover some very helpful skills and strategies in this talk. S-763

Your Issue Hurts Us!
Live in Irvine, CA, October 23 , 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of November 6 , 2006)
In all good relationships, we support the other person through the ups and downs of life. Everyone goes through difficulties, and we learn how to help one another in them. But sometimes, the particular struggle of one person is so huge, it threatens to tear the fabric of the relationship itself. What if your partner is clinically depressed, has a substance problem, or is a sex addict? These issues can seem insurmountable. But there are things you both can do that can help both the struggler and the connection to improve, get healthy, and stay attached. You will find another key to unlocking love’s door in this important talk. S-764

What Season is Your Relationship In? (A 5 part series)
Did you know that relationships go through their own stage? It's true! Just as weather has seasons, and people move from infancy to adulthood, your connection experiences its own definite shifts. It¹s important to know these stages, so that you can successfully navigate the waters of intimacy, and to get past any stuck places you encounter. In this series, you¹ll be able to identify where you are and how to get to the next stage of love.

The "Wow" Season
Live in Irvine, CA, October 30 , 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of November 13 , 2006)
This first stage of a relationship marks a time in which you two are very, very impressed with each other! It¹s a “wow” thing, and you find yourself quite attracted to this person. It”s even hard to see any blemishes in the connection that would be really important. Well, as all stages are, it¹s a temporary period. At the same time, this is a very valuable season, and is part of the foundation of a long-lasting attraction. Are you still in the “wow?” Or did you miss yours altogether? Learn how to experience and use this helpful season at Solutions. S-765

NOVEMBER 2006

Can I Trust You With Me?
Live in Irvine, CA, November 6 , 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of November 20, 2006)
“Wow” must give way to trust and safety at some point in a good relationship. We are all to learn to listen, give grace, and care about each other. So many times an attraction is like empty calories, and doesn¹t involve two hearts really connecting. This is where you move into trusting each other to be there, to be attentive, and to connect at emotional levels. Tonight you¹ll find the skills that will help you enter this great season. S-766

Wait A Minute, We're Different! Live in Irvine, CA, November 13 , 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of November 27 , 2006)
As connections begin to grow up, the next stage appears, and that has to do with the differences the two of you have. These aren't imperfections and flaws, they are simply the reality of two different perspectives, opinions, values and emotions. But often, people interpret this "not like me" stage as a sign that the connection isn't working. They wonder, is it time to go out and find myself another "Wow?" Not at all! In fact, the more you learn about this phase, the more you can see how helpful it is to bring closeness and excitement to your relationship. Get into your own "Not Like Me" stage, and reap the rewards! S-767

Imperfection Knocks At The Door
Live in Irvine, CA, November 20, 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud (CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of December 4, 2006)
This is the season that many people dread: when we find out that the other person isn’t just different, they are flawed and imperfect. They have habits and attitudes that aren't healthy, and worse, those aren’t going away overnight! Now what do we do? Fortunately, this is a normal stage, and there are some very helpful tips you can learn, which will assist you in moving into and through this season. Imperfection doesn't have to be a relational deal breaker! S-768

Deepening In Intimacy
Live in Irvine, CA, November 27 , 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of December 11, 2006)
This is the season that the most successful relationships often say is the best. You¹ve made it past the earlier stages, and, with some work, you find yourselves coming together in deeper, more satisfying ways than you had thought possible. It¹s the design that God intended, and it¹s available for all couples. Learn how the season of deepening can pay off for your relationship. S-769

DECEMBER 2006

Looking For Love
Live in Irvine, CA, December 4 , 2006 – Dr. Henry Cloud
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of December 18, 2006)
2So you still can't find that special person? You think you have tried everything and you are feeling frustrated and perhaps even a little hopeless. The fact that the Christmas season is approaching seems to magnify your longing for love. Join us as we help you explore ways to improve your chances of finding the love you have been looking for. Don't miss this night - you will receive practical tips and have some fun in the process. S-770

Home Alone
Live in Irvine, CA, December 11 , 2006 – Dr. John Townsend
(CCN Satellite Broadcast airs week of January 8 , 2007)
Whatever your marital status, single, seperated, divorced or perhaps emotionally disconnected from loved ones, you may find yourself "alone" this holiday season. Holidays can be stressful in the best of circumstances, so the thought of being alone at this time may leave you especially unhappy. Most of us long for happy family gatherings, but our reality can be very different. Don't let this holiday season catch you unprepared emotionally and socially. Join us as we help you plan your holiday strategy to avoid that "home alone" feeling. S-771