One of the words frequently tossed around in leadership discussions is "courage". Courage is often seen as a crucial ingredient of leadership, and in many ways, it is. But, if a leader is required to have courage, what is he or she to do when fear hits? Is fear bad? Can someone be a leader and be afraid?

From my experience with very good leaders, the answer is definitely "yes." You can be a leader and be afraid. BUT - it all depends on what you are afraid of. If you are afraid of the wrong things, then your fear could put you in the tank as a leader. But, if you are not afraid of the right things as a leader, you could land there as well.

So, what is it that good leaders should fear? Here are just a few:

1. Fear getting disconnected from yourself

Sometimes leaders get defined by others, or squeezed by the pressure of the tasks or mission, the schedule, or other determinants. Without even knowing that it is happening, they lose touch with themselves over time. They get disconnected from themselves.

If you have lost your passion, for example, you may have allowed the work to get you spending time and focus in the wrong areas. Operating outside of your passion, you no longer remember why you are leading what you are leading. Why you are there in the first place gets lost. Get back in touch, with you, with your feelings about what is going on, and even with your own needs. When leaders lose touch with what is going on inside of them, they fall into burnout, or worse, something destructive, like an affair, an addiction, or a series of impulsive decisions. They get numb, turn into robots, and then do something stupid to feel alive again.

You can stay in touch by having a place where you unload and discover what is happening within. Talk to trusted others with whom you can be real: peers, a coach, a mentor, or someone who can "draw it out". As Proverbs 20:5 says, "The purposes of a man's heart are deep waters, but a man of understanding draws them out." Get drawn out regularly so that your purposes don't become buried treasure.

2. Fear being out of touch with what others are saying or seeing about you

Leaders who isolate themselves from feedback about themselves get out of touch with reality. If you are not aware of how others are seeing you, then find out. Do 360s, talk to them, do surveys, gather your people and ask for honest feedback. Good leaders know what the water cooler word-on-the street is about themselves. First of all, it usually has some truth in it, and it may tell you what you need to do or fix. Also, if it is negative, you can head off many problems if you know what is brewing. If there is no truth in it, then you may have a political situation in the organization, and you need to know if you have a divisive person who is stirring things up. Do not seek this information like a politician takes polls of approval ratings, in order to adjust only to please everyone, or win a popularity contest. Rather, use this information to lead.

3. Fear being out of touch with the people that you lead

I once had the president of a company tell me that when he did some layoffs, one of the most painful parts of it was when a manager told him that the layoff was not what bothered him. What bugged him was that he had been there for two years, right down the hall, and the president had never once checked in to get to know him or his feedback. The president changed after that.

Different leaders have different ways of doing this, and certainly you cannot be in touch with everyone. But the principle is that the closer someone is to your inner circle, the greater amount of time you need to spend on gaining a lot of awareness of where their hearts are, because they really are your arms and legs. If you have a problem there, close to your level, you have a huge problem. Many times leaders make the mistake of assuming good performers are doing well and not staying close to them. They are not the leader's squeaky wheel, so they do not get much grease. But, they need your attention, and a listening ear to their hearts on a regular basis.

Then, as you work out into the concentric circles, obviously the time spent cannot be as much, but it can make a qualitatively huge impact. Bigger gatherings, town meetings, newsletters, department evaluations etc. can be used so that people know you are listening and want to know how they are doing, and how you are doing with them. You can be creative about how to do it, but never lose touch.

4. Fear not having enough personal infrastructure

When you build a business, you always worry about having enough infrastructure. You know that if you head in a certain direction, you are going to need the resources, systems, people, and capital for example, to sustain where you are headed. Otherwise, you fall into the trap that Jesus referred to when he said that no one builds a tower without first knowing how much it is going to cost. Otherwise, he gets halfway there and cannot complete it. Good advice. (Luke 14:28-30)

Less often, leaders think about the personal infrastructure increases that they are going to need for themselves. They work hard, build things, and their organization grows. There is increase. But, they end up doing more, and working harder, all the while getting spread out more and more without getting strengthened more and more. That is why you hear the phrase so often that "what got you here won't keep you here, or take you there." When things grow, you have to grow with them to be able to operate at that level and beyond. For example, you may be strong enough to play college football. If you keep playing well, you might be drafted into the NFL. Now, if you don't gain another 10% of muscle mass, you are going to really get hurt.

Look at your own personal infrastructure. Do you have enough increase built in to mirror the demands that are coming with your growth? You may need better coaches, better mentors, or better places to go for leadership development. You may need some continuing education. It might be time to up the ante on all of that. Also, you might need more focused time away, recreating and decompressing. The bottom line is sustainability. You have to be able to see whatever you are doing as sustainable personally, or you will turn a season of "red-lining" into a long-term pattern instead of a season. It will eventually prove to be too much unless you under gird it with what you need.

Those are just a few things to worry about. Fear, when used correctly, moves us to action. If a train is coming, and fear hits us, we get out of the way. If you are concerned enough about issues like these to move to action, then you will stay on top of them. If you do that, you will not lose yourself, be out of touch with what you need to know about, lose your best people, or succeed yourself into a mess.

The purposes of a man's heart are deep waters, but a man of understanding draws them out.

(Proverbs 20:5, NIV)

A one-week
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September 9 - 14, 2007

What one leader had to say about the Ultimate Leadership Workshop

Owning a business, I came to realize that the problems in my business life mirrored those in my personal life. Not only was I afraid to confront others - I didn't even know how to go about it. Not a very good problem to have if you want a successful business or personal life.

Although I was aware of my negative patterns of behavior, I found myself struggling to change. Then I read about the Ultimate Leadership workshop. After registering, I had nagging thoughts about the many leadership conferences I had attended that hadn't helped me at all, and wondered if this one would be any different.

Well, I did attend in May of 2007; WOW! Different from other conferences is not an adequate statement. It immediately cut out the pretense and went straight to addressing what I had so skillfully avoided--my role in problem relationships. Easy, NO! Helpful, YES!

We were placed in small groups and encouraged to be transparent. I not only recognized my problem areas in dealing with people; the good news is that I also received the necessary tools to change years of behavior patterns. My small group gave me the support that I needed to make changes; I now network with the group by telephone, and am encouraged to continue to walk in truth with boundaries.

My life has been changed! As a work in progress, I plan to return for an Alumni group as soon as possible. Thank you Henry and John and all the support staff.

Judy C. Kneece
President, EduCare Inc.
North Charleston, SC

 

 

 

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