Articles

Your Next Hard Thing by Dr. John Townsend

September 28, 2015jodi.cokerArticles4,077

You have never received a winner’s trophy before playing in the championship game. You have never been offered a promotion before you excelled in your job. Your parents never instructed you to make sure you ate your dessert first and not worry about the vegetables, since they would take care of themselves. EntitlementCure10_300

Why did none of these things happen? Because that’s not how successful lives work. It makes no sense to earn trophies before you win games, get a promotion before you perform well, or eat sweets before you consume your dinner. An attitude of entitlement, though, tells us that it can and should be this way: “You can have it all. Do what is easy and comfortable first, and you’ll be rewarded with a lot of amazing things.”

It’s a lie.

The entitlement disease’s insistence that you leave the hard stuff till later (or never) results in disaster. Let’s find out why.

Let’s say you asked me to coach you in how to find your dream career. You are forty-two years old and a pleasant person, and while your current position has paid the bills, it’s not exciting, it is not you, you have no passion for it. You want something that engages your strengths and skills, means something to you, and still provides for you and your family. This is a common scenario and an important one.

We’ll begin our search for this new career track through a process of discovering your strengths, looking at the opportunities out there, and evaluating what has worked for you and what has not. With every single client I coach through this lengthy and challenging process, we will get to one particular place. That place might be that your time is taken up with work or family issues. Or that you aren’t as passionate about this career-search process as when you started — the honeymoon is over. Or that you have other responsibilities — such as a friend who needs a lot of your time to help him through a divorce — that are taking your energy. That place is an important stage in your growth process. It can stall you, divert you, or derail you.

When we come to that place, I know that you’re about to find what I call your Next Hard Thing (NHT). Your NHT is the choice you need to make that will get you past the difficulty. I call it hard because it almost always is. It might be simple, it might be clear, but it won’t be easy. Most of the time, you’ll say, “I’ve been here before.” And yes, you have. But this time you need to do something about it — something challenging that will help you finally resolve it.

Identifying your NHT is a large part of the win. Once you know you need to say no to someone, or eliminate something good to make room for something great, or confront another person, you’re almost there. But to move beyond that, there are attitudes that you must deal with to keep you moving. The entitlement mantra concerning your NHT says: The next hard thing is too difficult, so I’ll just do something else now.

Most people succeed not by waiting, but by making a difficult choice. The better path is the Hard Way mantra, which says: Today I will choose to do something that helps resolve my obstacle, and I’ll feel better.

The NHT can take many different forms. Your NHT is about some specific behavior, and it may be behavior you have been avoiding: a phone call, setting a boundary with a friend, a conversation, canceling a subscription to a magazine you don’t need, turning off Facebook after thirty minutes. Behavior is measurable. It is not fuzzy. It is just behavior.

And behavior always begins with a step. Even a little step. It might be something that takes you just ten minutes today. That’s okay. A step begins the process and puts you in a better place.

Just plunge in.

Article originally posted on boundariesbooks.com

You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

4,077 Comments

  1. ΝΤΕΤΕΚΤΙΒNovember 6, 2017 at 10:23 amReply

    I enjoy, lead to I found just what I used to be having a
    look for. You have ended my 4 day long hunt! God Bless
    you man. Have a great day. Bye

  2. corporationsearchus.comNovember 6, 2017 at 1:06 pmReply

    Heyy there! I’ve beeen following your weblog for a while now and finally
    got the bravery to goo ahead and give you a shout out from Kingwood Tx!
    Just wanted tto tell you keep up the excellent work!

  3. JorgNovember 9, 2017 at 12:23 pmReply

    excellent put up, verry informative. I’m wondering why the opposite secialists of this sectkr do not realize this.
    You should continue your writing. I’m sure, you have a huge readers’
    base already!

  4. ElliotNovember 14, 2017 at 2:03 amReply

    Excellent goods from you, man. I have understand
    your stuff prevous to and you are just extremely
    fantastic. I actually like what you’ve acquired
    here, certainly like what you are stating aand the way in which you say it.
    You make it enjoyable and you still tale care of to
    keep it smart. I cant wait to read faar more from you.
    This iss actually a wonderful webb site.

  5. panele szklane łodź mokotowNovember 14, 2017 at 12:31 pmReply

    Ꭲhank you for sоmе other excellent post. Where else may anybody get that kind of information in such an ideal means of writing?
    I’ve a presentatіon subsequent week, and I’m
    at the search for such info.

  6. psychic readings onlineNovember 14, 2017 at 10:56 pmReply

    Wow, awesome weblog structure! How lengthy have you ever been blogging for?
    you made blogging glance easy. The overall glance of your
    site is excellent, as well as the content material!

  7. Your Next Hard Thing by Dr. John Townsend | Cloud Townsend ResourcesNovember 14, 2017 at 10:58 pmReply

    gogoanime

    I found a great…

  8. how to make your penis bigger with pillsNovember 15, 2017 at 7:16 amReply

    vimax vimax vimax vimax vimax vimax vimax

  9. panele szklane do łazienki łódźNovember 16, 2017 at 11:08 amReply

    Hеllo! I could have sworn I’ve visited this blog bеfore
    but after browsing through mɑny of the articles I
    realizeⅾ it’s new to me. Anyhow, I’m definiteⅼy
    happy I ԁiscovered it and I’ll be book-maгking it and checking back frequentlｙ!

  10. Psychic InformationNovember 17, 2017 at 6:06 pmReply

    It’s awesome to pay a visit this site and reading
    the views of all friends about this piece of writing,
    while I am also zealous of getting experience.

  11. BONGA CAMS - free sex camsNovember 18, 2017 at 12:12 amReply

    BONGA CAMS – free sex cams

    […]Your Next Hard Thing by Dr. John Townsend | Cloud Townsend Resources[…]

  12. Kuliah jurusan bisnis dan manajemenNovember 20, 2017 at 2:33 pmReply

    Heya i’m for the first time here. I came across this board and
    I in finding It really useful & it helped me out much. I’m hoping to give something back and aid others such as you heloped me.

    pengertian mata kuliah

  13. 800 519 1823November 25, 2017 at 12:45 amReply

    240 210 7113 703 272 4699 657 220 1614 805 897 1183 786 607 1798 daily jackpot calls scam 657 220 1612

  14. reverse cell phone directory edmontonNovember 25, 2017 at 2:05 amReply

    reverse cell phone lookup that really works reverse cell phone lookup utah reverse cell phone lookup voicemail reverse
    cellphone lookup qatar reverse cell phone number lookup manitoba reverse cell phone lookup genie reverse cell phone lookup genie

  15. at&t official whitepagesNovember 25, 2017 at 5:51 amReply

    official white pages reverse lookup official whitepages uk official
    white pages official whitepages pa official white pages official white pages florida official
    whitepages ohio

  16. cell phone carrier lookup imeiNovember 25, 2017 at 8:27 amReply

    cell phone carrier lookup india cell carrier lookup api cell phone carrier lookup web service cell phone carrier lookup api cell carrier lookup canada
    reverse cell phone carrier lookup free free cell phone carrier lookup api

  17. 411 yellow pages reverse lookupNovember 25, 2017 at 9:53 amReply

    canada 411 lookup 411 com white pages reverse address lookup
    411 bc reverse lookup free telephone number lookup 411 411 bc reverse lookup 411
    reverse lookup cell phone lookup 411

  18. reverse cell phone look up freeNovember 26, 2017 at 7:45 amReply

    trace a phone number free of cost free verizon cell phone
    lookup phone number lookup by name for free free phone search lookup phone number search for free with name
    find name of cell phone owner free find cell phone name by number
    free

  19. 411 usa white pagesNovember 26, 2017 at 12:06 pmReply

    411 usa ms 411 usa los angeles canada411 pour usa 411 usa louisiana 411 phone book usa 411 usa naples florida
    411 usa miami

  20. kasamba psychic readingsNovember 27, 2017 at 1:04 amReply

    We are a group of volunteers and opening a new scheme in our community.
    Your website offered us with valuable information to work on. You have done an impressive job and our entire community will be thankful
    to you.

  21. anywho artNovember 27, 2017 at 3:38 pmReply

    anywho editions anywho.com y anywho cell numbers anywho
    reverse telephone lookup anywho suede booties anywho.com business anyhow vs anyway

  22. free teen camsNovember 28, 2017 at 1:07 pmReply

    I’ve been browsing online more than 2 hours
    today, yet I never found any interesting article likoe
    yours. It is pretty worth enough for me. Personally, if all site owners and bloggers made good content as you did,
    the internet will be a lot more useful than ever before.

  23. ebay com telephone numberNovember 29, 2017 at 3:04 amReply

    1800 prank numbers ebay customer service phone number india ebay call me now 801 545 5133 1800 reverse
    lookup 1800 ebay ebay call back number

  24. EdwardNovember 29, 2017 at 5:34 amReply

    Thamk you a lot for sharing this with all people you actually recognize what you are speaking approximately!
    Bookmarked. Please additionally consult with
    my web site =). We could have a hyperlink alternate agreement among us

  25. chaturbate-girls.comNovember 29, 2017 at 7:47 amReply

    My brother recommended I might like this web site.
    He was totally right. This post truhly made my
    day. You cann’t iimagine simply how much timke I had spent
    for this info! Thanks!

  26. cam showNovember 30, 2017 at 1:10 pmReply

    Hello Dear, are you in fact visiting this website regularly,
    if so afterward you will absolutely get pleasant knowledge.

  27. mac antivirus melhorDecember 1, 2017 at 1:09 pmReply

    mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner

  28. apple cleaner sprayDecember 1, 2017 at 9:03 pmReply

    mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac
    cleaner

  29. how to use the mac brush cleanerDecember 2, 2017 at 3:55 pmReply

    mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner

  30. home health care agency in alexandria va apartments utilitiesDecember 4, 2017 at 7:49 amReply

    I’m going to immediately clutch your own rss while i can not to find your own electronic mail registration backlink or maybe e-newsletter service. Carry out you have almost any? Please permit us recognize to make sure that I might merely signed up. Thank you.. home health care agency in alexandria va apartments utilities

  31. mac or macbookDecember 4, 2017 at 11:55 amReply

    mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner

  32. bitdefender antivirus plus macDecember 4, 2017 at 11:58 amReply

    mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac
    cleaner mac cleaner

  33. speed up after effects macDecember 4, 2017 at 6:48 pmReply

    mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner mac cleaner

  34. chung cư b6 giảng võ. chung cu b6 giang voDecember 5, 2017 at 6:46 amReply

    Hello There. I ran across the weblog the utilization of bing. This is the really smartly published content. I will you should definitely search for it in addition to get back to read more of one’s valuable facts.. chung cư b6 giảng võ. chung cu b6 giang vo Basically article. I’ll certainly come back.

  35. mac antivirus en ligne gratuitDecember 6, 2017 at 1:03 amReply

    Adware Cleaner For Mac Review Adware Cleaner For Mac Review Adware Cleaner
    For Mac Review Adware Cleaner For Mac Review Adware Cleaner For Mac Review Adware Cleaner For Mac Review
    Adware Cleaner For Mac Review

  36. telecharger sophos antivirus gratuit macDecember 6, 2017 at 1:12 amReply

    Best 2017 Virus Barrier Express: un antivirus
    per Mac! New 2017 Best 2017 Virus Barrier Express: un antivirus per Mac!

    New 2017 Best 2017 Virus Barrier Express: un antivirus per
    Mac! New 2017 Best 2017 Virus Barrier Express: un antivirus per Mac!
    New 2017 Best 2017 Virus Barrier Express: un antivirus per Mac!
    New 2017 Best 2017 Virus Barrier Express: un antivirus per Mac!
    New 2017 Best 2017 Virus Barrier Express: un antivirus per Mac!
    New 2017

  37. Important Avira Antivirus Pro 2017 Crack with Activation Code [Windows + Mac] Best 2017December 6, 2017 at 11:00 amReply

    Important Avira Antivirus Pro 2017 Crack with Activation Code [Windows + Mac] Best 2017 Important Avira Antivirus Pro 2017
    Crack with Activation Code [Windows + Mac] Best
    2017 Important Avira Antivirus Pro 2017
    Crack with Activation Code [Windows + Mac] Best 2017 Important Avira Antivirus Pro 2017 Crack with Activation Code [Windows + Mac] Best 2017
    Important Avira Antivirus Pro 2017 Crack with Activation Code [Windows + Mac] Best 2017 Important
    Avira Antivirus Pro 2017 Crack with Activation Code [Windows + Mac] Best
    2017 Important Avira Antivirus Pro 2017 Crack with Activation Code [Windows + Mac] Best 2017

  38. mac antivirus usbDecember 6, 2017 at 3:23 pmReply

    Advanced Mac Cleaner Seri?S Advanced Mac Cleaner Seri?S Advanced Mac Cleaner Seri?S Advanced Mac Cleaner Seri?S Advanced Mac Cleaner Seri?S Advanced Mac Cleaner
    Seri?S Advanced Mac Cleaner Seri?S

  39. best malware cleaner macDecember 6, 2017 at 8:33 pmReply

    Advanced Mac Cleaner.Com Advanced Mac Cleaner.Com Advanced Mac Cleaner.Com Advanced
    Mac Cleaner.Com Advanced Mac Cleaner.Com Advanced Mac Cleaner.Com Advanced Mac
    Cleaner.Com